WAR GAMES

[shinsengumi]

10...

9...

This year, you will be participating in teams. Your teams, as sponsored, are as follows:

Aeva and Ystelle; Ashleigh and Larsen; Aubrey and Kieran; Brigitte and Ellias; Cabel and Joss; Cyrel and Hollingworth; D'Ivann and Helene; Drael and Kristopher; Griffith and Xian; Fila and Lisette; Indra and Zacharius; Ivy and Reece; Kol and Laurence; Leonel and Solus; Lucinde and Visvaldis; Malis and Vox; Oberin and Odette; Shryke and Siegfried; Talbot and Thane.

Should both members of a team survive, you will both be permitted to leave the arena alive. May the odds be ever in your favour...

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Comments

[prophesy]

[Who was it. Hah.

Sieg glances over, first at the fingers rested against him and then to Shryke's eyes. It's a fair question, and fair concern. What a melodramatic display he's given. How fucking amusing they'll all find him, watching safely from their homes, their beds. Perhaps Xian would be laughing loudest of all.

Fuck. It's just Xian. It's only fucking Xian. He doesn't-- he didn't fucking care about Xian.]

No one. [He turns his face back toward the forest, continuing in a low, shallow voice;] He was only ever no one.

[raptorial]

I know about being no one. [Shryke speaks without hesitation, just the first true thing that comes to mind. Truly, it isn't about his own feelings and he'll hardly force Sieg to speak with him, but it seems like Sieg should. Grieving is a private thing, but not one to be stifled.] I know about being no one who matters to someone anyway, too.

[prophesy]

[Why should words like that unsettle him? Why should they drudge up such emotion, clog his throat so? What is this he's feeling?]

You believe he mattered to me? I didn't think about him once today. I wasn't... [...prepared for this. The bitterness of it shudders through Sieg, tart and sharp, burning his eyes. This is guilt, isn't it. This is shame.]

He's... [But what else is there to say? What can he possibly say...?]

[raptorial]

You broke your hand.

[Shryke points it out softly, before settling back on his ankles and crossing his arms over his knees. He muses for a time, all the while watching Sieg, and then offers a more extended monologue. It's probably going too far, but he thinks maybe it'll do Sieg good to hear it—the other man doesn't seem able to say much.]

If he was the one who died first, he probably didn't think about anyone else, either. He either had to defend himself, or he wanted to die. Griffith wouldn't have started it, but it's easy to make him angry.

Who else are we supposed to think about, when we're all trying to live? We can put them all from our mind because we need to survive, and it's easier to imagine doing that if we don't think we have to fight people we love.

Maybe you didn't love him. But you're going to miss him, aren't you? He's gone now, and you didn't think about that before.

[prophesy]

[Sieg listens, gaze still fixed out across the surrounding woodland, the raw glisten of his eyes the only betrayer of emotion. Shryke speaks with a great deal of authority, too much for someone practically a stranger to him, and in other circumstances Sieg might have criticised him for it. Instead he tries to let it pass unheeded. He'll take the words, thank Shryke, ask to be alone. The night will end.

Only, the boy is right about one thing. He will miss Xian. He doesn't have a choice. His fingers are twitching pain and every little flinch from this self-inflicted hurt is going to have Xian all over it.]

He was intelligent. Uneducated, but... [But what? Why is he even talking? And what is he saying? It's too fucking soon to be romanticising like this, he has never once considered Xian in such a favourable light. But it is true, isn't it? He's just never seen it before now.

The words keep coming, low and soft and unbidden.] When it became obvious how sick I was, and how suddenly it could come upon me, my parents grew nervous of letting me stray far from their sight. So growing up I spent a lot of time under tutelage. I used to read. I'd read any book I could lay my hands on just to pass the time. I'm educated. I didn't have a great deal of choice.

But that didn't matter with Xian. He always had ways to make me feel stupid. [Has he ever admitted that before? Sieg chuckles, short and wry and grim, the bitter amusement coming through in his words.] And he'd laugh. If he were here now, he'd laugh at this. He'd want to know how it always manages to be about myself. He'd call this self-pity.

[And if he goes on much longer, Xian won't be the only one laughing. Sieg closes his eyes, presses his forehead to one raised knee.]

I apologise for causing a scene. If you'd rather not burden yourself with an injured teammate, I understand.

[It sounds peaceful, staying here alone. If he keeps his eyes closed long enough someone will find him, maybe keep him from opening them again. How's that for self-pity, huh, Xian...?]

[raptorial]

[Shryke listens, all respectful attentive silence, until Sieg apologises to him. That is the only time he shakes his head, and speaks in a tone ever-soft.]

We're teammates. You don't have to apologise. Do you want to watch first? I'll try to sleep if you don't think you can.

[He wonders if he'd react the same to one of his friends dying. He thinks he might manage to do worse. He doesn't say the thought Sieg's drawn from him, speaking about his Xian: That this person Sieg's going to miss sounded interesting, if nothing else. And that Shryke thinks maybe he could understand why Sieg will miss him, if he'd ever had the chance.]